Tampa Bay is not a major league city

So I was perusing the American League standings today, enjoying where the Yankees were situated, when I discovered something amazing: There is a major league baseball team in Tampa Bay! Not only that, but they're up there in first with my Yankees!

I'm sure you're as stunned by this development as I am, but it's true. As a public service, I did a little research, and it turns out that the Tampa Bay Rays (as they're known) actually played in the World Series two years ago. They may have even won it, I don't know how to check.

Anyhoo, what surprises me so much about this is that based on my experience, Tampa Bay was not a major league city, not in the least. The speakeasies were pathetic -- only one type of whiskey! And I visited better gentlemen's clubs in Hot Springs, Arkansas, than in Tampa Bay. And you would never put a major league baseball team in Hot Springs, Arkansas.

If you live in Tampa Bay, I'm sorry for you.

On the other hand, St. Petersburg, Florida, is a great city and light years away from Tampa Bay in terms of major league quality. If they were going to put a baseball team in Florida, they should have built the stadium in Ol' St. Pete. They had this one club there called The Sunshine Club that I used to love. They had truly major league dames there, almost as good as the dames in Manhattan.

So bottom line: What a mistake major league baseball made when they put the team in Tampa Bay instead of St. Petersburg. Maybe someday they'll fix their mistake. If they do, you can thank ol' Babe for the idea.