I'm getting a lot of flak about some of my predictions. Some people think Prince Albert Pujols is gonna be on the Yankees eventually, and others think Tim Lipscome is gonna be with the Yanks. I dunno. I just don't see it. I think they'll happily keep playing in the weaker league and pad their numbers on the way to the Hall of Fame. I don't blame 'em. I'd'a done it too if I'd had the chance, but without free agency, I was stuck with the Yankees until they turned me loose when I got old, those lying bastards. But I got over it and I forgive those assholes, who, I have it on good authority, are rotting in hell as we speak. At least Ed Barrow is.*
*True story: Do you know what Harry Frazee's nickname for Ed Barrow was? "Simon," as in Simon Legree from that book Uncle Tom's Cabin.** And did you know that Barrow let Harry call him that, even though he knew he was being compared to a greedy slaveowner? That should give you an idea of what a mo-fo he was.
** I never read the book or anything, but Moe Berg (back when I was still talking to him) told me the story. FYI in case you were wondering, it's about slaves and shit. Written in like 1776 or something.
What was I talking about? Oh yeah, the controversy over my prediction about the Yankees. My intern, whose name I don't know, maybe Timmy or Tommy or something, tells me that even Arrianna and Josh Marshall are talking about it, and I have no idea who they are. I assume the kid is telling me the truth.
Anyway, the prediction. So most of the people who emailed me about my post agree that Mauer, Kemp, Greinke, and the others are destined to become Yankees. That's not really the controversial part.
The controversial part is whether it's "good" for baseball that the Yankees are going to get so many great players. For example, here's a letter from a reader known as RD:
The Yankees represent all that is wrong with baseball. They have so much money because they're in the largest media market in teh country and they got a stadium given to them by Rudy Giuliani, so they can just buy pennant after pennant. The Yankees are why I stopped being a baseball fan. Now I only watch "pure" sports like curling.
Dude, first of all, you shouldn't admit to anyone that you follow curling. Second of all, you are an idiot. Third of all, you are a whiner. Fourth of all, what's wrong with the Yankees winning pennant after pennant? Fifth of all, what's your problem? Did your girlfriend leave you for a Yankee or something? Or maybe did the Yankees promise you that you could become their manager when your playing days were finished, so you hit tons of home runs and helped them win a bunch of pennants, only to be shoved out the door when the time came for them to make good on their promise? Is that why you're still mad at them sometimes, even though you tell people on your blog that you actually "forgive" Ed Barrow?*
*Did you also know that Ed Barrow, when he managed the Red Sox, thought the team would be better off with me as a starting pitcher rather than as a hitter? Did you know that Ed Barrow is in the Hall of Fame even though he was an incompetent, conniving moron? Do you know that Hall of Fame voters are only smart about 50% of the time?
All of a sudden I don't want to talk about this anymore. I don't know why. Luckily, my intern tells me I've already addressed this issue. So just read that post and then we'll talk more about it when I feel up to it again.
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