Moe Berg is dead to me

So I just found out that Moe Berg was fucking with me when he told me that the German word for "taking pleasure in the misfortune of others" was "ich-bin-ein-berliner." He made me look like a fool to all my loyal readers, and I've completely cut him off. He claims he doesn't care, but I know that one day he's going to moan about not being invited to one of my parties and I'm just going to get all "ich-bin-ein-berliner" on his ass.

The worst part of this whole disaster is that Cobb got involved. In fact, he's the one who tracked me down and told me that I had the word wrong. First of all, having Cobb tell me I got something wrong is like Sarah Palin giving you advice on what to name your kids. You just don't want to hear it.

Even worse, Cobb had one of his maniacal grins when he told me. He just loved it! What a douche.

I wish there was a way to independently figure out the right word for this idea, but I don't know how to do it. The best I could do was ask Lou, who has some German in him, and he asked his mom. I totally trust Lou and his mom on this, so when you're reading the post below, please substitute the following German whenever you read "ich-bin-ein-berliner":

Fahrvergnügen